Thunder rumbled ahead, and I cast my eyes skyward to confirm the direction of the sound. A large thunderhead sat menacingly on the horizon, directly in front of my crew and I. Right on course. The storm was going to break soon, and we were far enough to avoid the worst of it, but we’d still need to find shelter before nightfall.
The wind picked up, tossing sand into little whirlwinds, as one of my crew members came up next to me. “Leader, we’ve found a town to the northeast. Should we investigate?” He pointed to an area to the right of us. Indeed, there seemed to be a haze on the horizon that could be one of the many ruined towns that dotted the endless desert around us.
“How long would it take to get there?”
“About an hour and half.” The sun had a couple hours before it was due to set, so the timing was perfect.
“Let’s go.” I changed directions and the crew member fell back with the rest of the group.
I don’t know how I became the leader of this little group; I barely even remember what made me enter the desert in the first place. People just seem to stick to me, and now I have a duty to continue my job for as long as they stay by my side. At least they make it less lonely. They’re the ones who gave me the title (name?) “Leader.” I can’t say it’s my favorite, but it’s been so long since anyone called me anything else, and it’s fitting. Most of the time I just follow the storms, trying to find and help anyone we find stranded out here. Sometimes they join my little group, most of the time they don’t, and we escort them back to one of the protected towns, but either way we must proceed forward. There’s always someone who needs help, and not many who can provide it.
Traveling in the desert always seemed to take longer than it actually does, but eventually we reached the ruined town. Everything was covered in sand, some of the crumbling brick buildings reduced to nothing but doorways and corners.
“Everyone, split up. Try to find buildings with roofs or three walls still standing, anything that could protect us from the sand tonight. Meet up again here in an hour and a half.”
Light chatter broke out then faded as the crew of about twenty split off into groups of two or three and started searching the town. I started looking too, heading in the direction of a cluster of buildings. I hadn’t been walking for long before a poster on one of the walls caught my eye. It was a miracle that it was still attached, however many years after this town was abandoned, but what caught my eye was the girl on it. Blue eyes, long teal hair pulled up into twintails, and oh-so familiar. The poster was an advertisement for a concert, or a musical performance of sorts. Was it successful? Or did it not even come to pass; the sand swallowed the world so quickly these days. I stared at it for a moment before carefully pulling it down and folding it to put in my pocket. For whatever reason, it felt wrong to leave it here.
Before I could get back to searching, one of the crew members came up to me. “I think you should see this Leader…”
I turned around to face them, only to see what they were trying to show me. At the edge of the town, a castle-looking building made of scrap metal towered over the town. The sun glinted off the material, forcing me to squint.
“Should we investigate? Almost everyone is already gathered near the entrance.”
“Ah-? How long was I standing here- Never mind, let’s head over. It might not be safe, so don’t get your hopes up, but it’s worth checking out.”
Up close the castle seemed even bigger. Without the ruined buildings in the way, I could see the massive archway that made up the entryway to the building, each floor was two or three times the height of an average person and the arch reached all the way to the ceiling. The rest of the group was gathered around the entrance, a couple peering inside but most waiting for me to arrive. They parted when I got close, letting me walk right up to where the sand turned into the metal of the structure.
I hesitantly reached out to the entryway, expecting it to be hot enough to burn, but it was surprisingly cool to the touch. I took a couple of caution steps inside and the floor didn’t immediately give out under me, which was a good sign, if anything. The rest of the group was looking at me expectantly, so, not wanting to keep them waiting, I waved them inside too. “Don’t go too far, we don’t know how stable this place is.” I don’t really need to worry about them, most of them have been at this for months or years, but it’s a force of habit to remind them to be safe.
The main foyer of the castle was massive, leading far enough back that only the worst winds would be able to blow sand to the farthest end of it. We wouldn’t have to worry about that tonight, so the group dispersed throughout the room, settling into the usual cliques. I tracked down the member who had alerted me to the castle, letting them know that I would be gone for a little while, and set off to explore the castle. If there were food or water stores somewhere, it’d be worth restocking while we were here.
Only after I had been walking for a couple minutes did I realize how quiet it was. The group was never loud, but there was always a low hum of chatter. In here, the only noise was the soft thump of each footstep against the solid metal. It would have been terrifying if it was dark, it would be very easy to get lost in those tall metal halls, but there was some kind of light fixture that ran along the ceiling, far enough above that the light was just a warm glow at ground level. It was comforting in a way, safe, nostalgic even…
My thoughts returned to the poster I had found earlier. That had been my dream when I was a child, to perform on a stage like that. If the sand hadn’t consumed my hometown, maybe the streets would’ve contained flyers for my concerts too. I hadn’t sung in years though, and hadn’t touched a guitar in twice as long. All my instruments had to be left behind when we evacuated, and while I kept up with singing as we relocated, once I headed into the desert it was much too hard to continue. I tell myself it’s because the sandy air is too rough on the lungs, but I honestly had just lost all passion for it. Music is too much of a reminder of all I have lost.
Half lost in my thoughts, I managed to catch a glimpse of blue hair turning a corner. I wasn’t alone. My guard went up, but I found myself walking faster to catch up. When I reached the junction, I was met with an extremely short hallway leading out to a massive courtyard.
It was round, like the outside of the castle, and there were four entryways to it, one at each cardinal direction. But what stood out the most was the apple tree. It was missing all of its leaves, but aside from that, it seemed healthy. Multiple stories tall and dotted with bright red fruits, it was the first time I had ever seen a plant that big. Despite being open to the sky, there wasn’t a speck of sand anywhere I could see. Instead, sparse grass was dotted around the yard, growing denser the closer it got towards the tree.
“Welcome to the Garden.”
My eyes snapped to the sound. At the base of the massive tree stood the girl with the blue hair, her hands clasped behind her back and a light smile on her face. Her voice carried easily despite the distance between us.
“I don’t often get visitors, but everyone who finds their way here is here for a reason. I’m Miku, what’s your name?”
That was a name I hadn’t heard in a while. It felt strange in this girl’s voice, but it suited her somehow. Better than it ever suited me.
I didn’t make a move to answer though, and just stood warily at the edge of the courtyard. After a moment, Miku’s face dropped slightly and pity pinched my heart. Part of me felt that I was being mean and I should give her an answer, or at least move closer so I wasn’t hiding in the shadows of the building. But I did neither.
After we stood there in awkward silence for a moment, she hesitantly walked towards me, stopping a few paces away. I watched her study my face and I could only imagine what she saw. Messy and tangled dark teal hair—hers was a cool blue that shone in the sun. Suntanned skin that made me look older than I was—hers was so pale I could almost see through it, like she never went outside. Dull teal eyes furrowed in a permanent scowl from staring at the sun too long—hers were bright, full of life, and entirely way too piercing.
“Suna.”
“What?” The single word out of nowhere startled me into finally speaking.
“I’m going to call you Suna, since you won’t give me your name.” She bounced backwards a step, hands behind her back and a smile on her face.
“You don’t have to…”
“But I want to! And besides, what fun is a conversation when only one person knows the other's name? I need to call you something.”
Back to silence for me. This girl was way too good at catching me off guard, so the best course of action would be to stay quiet. I still had no idea what her goal was, after all.
“Oh, you are no fun.” She was pouting again, and my resolve wavered for a second. But only for a second. Then she took my hands and started gently pulling me forward, and my resolve cracked into pieces. Her hands were warm and soft and she just felt so human that I couldn’t doubt or deny her anymore. I let her lead me to a patch of grass beneath the big tree and sat when she patted a spot next to her.
“Will you tell me about yourself?” she asked after we got settled. “I like hearing the stories of the people who pass through here.”
Other people had been here before? I set that question aside for later, I might as well actually humor her. “There’s not much to tell. I just chase the storms and try to help anyone who was left stranded by them. My hometown was destroyed years ago and I could never settle down anywhere after that, so wandering just made sense.”
Miku pondered my response for a moment, then slowly spoke up. “Do you wanna know something, Suna?” She didn’t give me a chance to respond. “Most people in the desert are looking for something and a lot of them end up here, consciously or unconsciously looking for guidance.” Her eyes bored into mine again. “I’ll listen to whatever you want to tell me.”
“That’s all there is to it, though. I don’t remember much from my hometown, and this is all I’ve been doing for the past couple years. It’s tough and not always rewarding, but it’s enough.” Miku leaned back, resting all her weight on her palms behind her. She didn’t seem fully satisfied, so I changed tactics. “What about you? What’s your story?”
At this Miku perked up. “Ooh, I don’t get asked that often. Hmm, well, I guess I’ve never known anything other than the Garden. This place is all I have memories of, since I can’t really leave it. It’s not lonely though! Sometimes people like you come by and I get to chat for a bit, and the rest of the time I come up with stories in my head—I don’t have anything to write them down with, but my memory is pretty good, and I try to recite them often so I don’t forget any details.”
“That… doesn’t sound that different from what I do, just a lot of time alone with your thoughts. What do you mean you can’t leave though?”
“I’ve never been able to walk through the front entrance. I think I tried a lot when I was younger, but if this place doesn’t want me to leave, why keep trying to fight it? I like helping people anyways, and, from the stories I’ve heard, the outside world isn’t very nice. I do wish I could tell my stories to people though…”
I was silent for a bit. Suddenly this girl looked so small, so frail. I wanted to help her, to at least leave her better off than she was now, but there wasn’t much I could actually do.
“Have you tried music?” As soon as the words left my mouth I regretted it. Just because this girl might use the same name I used to have and look weirdly similar to a younger me, doesn’t mean she would be interested in the same things as me. I shouldn’t have said-
But her eyes lit up. “No, I haven’t. I don’t think there’s any instruments here, but…” She trailed off, brows furrowed in thought for a moment before she started singing.
Her voice was beautiful. Soft, light, but clear, with the same piercing ability as her eyes. She sang of a crush, of the uncertainty and timidness of a first love, with so much conviction and understanding that I almost forgot she wasn’t a normal girl who lived a normal life. Even without instrumentals, the song sounded so full of life and emotion.
As she finished the song and the world seemed to be settling back into place, a keyboard made of light appeared in front of Miku. With a restrained grin, she experimentally hit one of the keys, and, when it lit up, she swept her hand over the length of the entire thing, the keys lighting up in every color of the rainbow as she passed over them. It seemed to hum with energy, as if it was waiting to be played, and Miku gently set her hands on the keys. She was slow at first, as if she didn’t know what she was doing, but quickly sped up into a song.
This one was much different than the last, a fast and chaotic melody that didn’t make much sense, but was addictive nonetheless. Miku blended it into another song, similarly fast paced, and I could almost imagine her dancing along recklessly to it, without a care in a dying world. Back to back, she sang of love, hope and despair, each song masterfully played. When her mini concert came to an end, all I could do was clap. Each song was a story woven with music, and the emotions of the characters in them were expressed spectacularly. I could’ve listened to her play all day, and I would be lying if part of me didn’t want to play with her.
I was so lost in her songs that I hadn’t noticed the sun setting. The top of the castle was casting long shadows on the far side of the courtyard walls and it had gotten considerably darker where Miku and I were sitting. It hadn’t gotten cold yet like it usually does out in the open, but I didn’t really want to stick around to find out if it would.
“I should probably get back to my group,” I said eventually, shuffling into a better position to stand up.
“Ah, it has gotten that late, sorry for keeping you so long.” Miku seemed genuinely sad that I was going to leave, making me hesitate.
“Here.” Miku stood up, jumped a little to pull an apple off the tree, and offered it to me, with a hand to help me up. I took both. “As a thank you, for hanging out with me for so long and showing me music. If you plant the seeds, they’ll grow into a tree like this one.”
I rolled the apple around in my hands. It didn’t seem to be anything special, just a normal red apple—if you could call it normal, fresh fruit was a rarity these days. “But nothing grows out there, they’ll just die if I try to plant it.”
Her hands covered mine, stilling my spinning and making look up at her. “If you believe, they will grow. Trust me.” Her warm smile didn’t give me any other choice.
Somehow, when Miku said it, anything seemed possible. “Thank you, Miku. I’ll be sure to plant it.”
“Now go before I make you stay here,” she said with a laugh, releasing my hands and stepping back. “The path back will be straight forward, the castle will make sure you don’t get lost.”
I didn’t doubt her. I took a couple steps backward before turning around and headed towards the threshold I had entered from. I couldn’t bring myself to look back until I reached the end of the hallway and was about to turn the corner again. She was sitting under the tree again, the piano out in front of her, looking lost in whatever music she was playing. I couldn’t hear it anymore.
The walk back to the group was uneventful. Like Miku said, the halls formed themselves to be a straight shot, no crossroads to take a wrong turn at. I could’ve sworn there were some before, but then again, I was pretty lost in thought on her way there.
The apple sat comfortably in my pocket, the weight both weighing down that side and reassuring me it was still there. I would’ve held onto it, but to get to the seeds, I would have to eat it or cut it open, and I might as well make sure it didn’t bruise it in the meantime. It felt odd. I didn’t normally carry things around, and my jacket wasn’t very well suited for it, but the change wasn’t unwelcome.
I rounded a corner and my little group came into view. A few looked up and waved when they noticed me, but most carried on chatting and playing the little games they liked to play when there was down time. I found a quiet corner a little ways away from the main gathering and settled down.
I looked around, taking in the group, illuminated only slightly by moonlight. I was proud of them, I don’t really think I had ever realized that before. Despite how harsh the desert and their work was, they stuck with it, trekking on with a smile on their faces and laughter in their voices. Without them, I think I would have gone crazy years ago. With them, I could get through anything.
- - - - - - - - -
7 years later
I miss her sometimes. It might be kind of stupid to miss someone who you only knew for a couple hours, but she genuinely was a turning point in my life and I wish I could tell her that.
The apple seeds grew, miraculously. She said they would, and I trusted her, but it still defied all odds in this desolate wasteland. Except, I can’t really call it that anymore, because it’s neither desolate nor a wasteland anymore, at least here.
The morning after we left Miku’s castle, it disappeared when our backs were turned. As the months passed, some members convinced themselves it wasn't real, a mirage or heat-induced hallucination. I knew though. The seeds sat in my pocket, reminding me every time my fingers brushed them, but there was no way I could forget even if I didn’t have them.
At some point, the sandstorms lessened drastically. We used to see them daily, at least off in the distance if not right on top of us, but now we’d be lucky to find one once every two weeks. Then we started finding things. At first it was seed packages in the ruins of a town, next it was stranded animals, and eventually, an oasis. It started a huge fight, the group was torn on whether to stay and use our new resources to start a new life, or to keep traveling the desert. It was the first time the group fought. I stayed out of the conflict, but ultimately decided to stay at the oasis. I had the apple seeds, and I wanted to see them grow, so with a heavy heart, I said my goodbyes to half the group. The other half stayed with me, and we slowly built our new village up.
I planted most of the apple seeds in the town center, figuring the more there were, the greater the chances of it growing. I kept one for myself though, to plant in my backyard. The one in town grew extremely quickly, bearing fruit by year three and now, four years after that, was starting to tower over our one-story houses. I can see the top of it from my house, the leaves standing out even more than the other trees around the oasis. It’s a comforting reminder of hope, of the growth and resilience of our village.
I was gifted a guitar a year after our settlement, by someone who had been with me from the start and somehow remembered I used to play. It took a lot of restraint to appear thankful and happy, but everything in my body burned with the desire to hide it in the back of a closet and forget about it. When I got home with it that evening though, the tree had sprouted, almost as if she was telling me I should play. I couldn’t take that as anything but a sign, so I pushed past any lingering feelings and started practicing. I was extremely rusty, of course, but I would sit in my kitchen, the small apple sprout in a cup on the window sill above my sink, and when I got stuck or annoyed with myself, I’d take a break to watch its tiny leaves sway in the wind. I always picked the guitar back up.
It’s grown a bit now, big enough to plant in the ground behind my house. This means I can’t sit in the kitchen with it anymore, but it’s probably better to hang out outside all day rather than inside. I can play guitar, or garden, or work on one of the never-ending projects, and people will occasionally come by and chat, or bring their own instrument and play with me. It’s nice.
Today was one of those days, but the late summer heat was making me tired. I was sitting with my back to the wall of my house, guitar beside me, when I heard faint singing from the direction of the town center. This wasn’t really uncommon, it turns out a lot of the group was musically or artistically inclined, but as I sat, more and more people started heading over to watch. Eventually, getting curious, I pushed myself up and headed over to see what was going on.
I got there while the singer was singing the last notes of a song, her and a couple others standing on the platform surrounding the apple tree. The crowd in front of the trio was too big to clearly see who it was, despite how much head-craning and standing on tippy-toes I tried. I looked around quickly to see if there was a better vantage point or a weak point to push through the crowd, but apparently I didn’t need to. The singer noticed me and for a second we locked eyes over the crowd before she hopped down into the crowd. It quickly parted as she made her way through and seconds later, there she was, just a couple feet away from me.
Miku.
She didn’t look a day older, yet she looked so much more grown. She was still soft and bright, skin looking much healthier, but her eyes were deeper, not quite as wide with curiosity. Still incredibly piercing though, I doubt that will ever change. She wore a practiced neutral gaze, but her shoulders were pinched with tension. Clutched gently in one hand was a microphone, the only thing betraying her slight shaking.
“Suna?”
It took a second to find my voice but I managed to croak out, “Yeah, that’s me,” with a nod. Her face immediately broke into a grin and she launched herself at me with a light laugh, throwing her arms around my neck. Her momentum made me swing her around, making me laugh too, and when we settled down, she lowered her arms and stepped back from the embrace.
“I’ve been looking everywhere for you, y’know. Right after I managed to get out of the Garden, I heard news of a big apple tree and figured that was you, but no one knew exactly where it was. I’ve been wandering the desert for months.” She rocked back and forth on her heels, hands clasped behind her back like the day I met her. Her smile was infectious, tinged with an air of confidence that she probably carried all the time now.
I could feel the people around us watching our interaction, and didn’t want to just stand here catching up when Miku was in the middle of a concert. I realized I had been silent for a moment too long and blurted out the first thing on my mind, if only to not make the moment awkward. “Can I play with you?”
What. Why did I say that? I mean, it wasn’t like I wasn’t used to playing around people now, but I hadn’t been a spectacle, the main focus, anywhere other than the comfort of my own home where I could stop whenever. I should clarify-
“Yeah, of course!” Seeing the way Miku’s eyes lit up, I realized it didn’t matter. I did want to play with her, and I could push past whatever stupid doubts were holding me back. She grabbed my hand and almost ran back up to the makeshift stage, helping me up after her.
“Rin, could you give her your spare guitar?” Miku requested, putting the mic she had taken back on the stand and adjusting it. Rin, a blonde girl with a blunt bob, voiced an affirmative and turned back to their small pile of gear. The other person there was a blond boy, who was Rin’s mirror image, sitting behind a basic drum kit. How they managed to drag all this around the desert I had no idea.
Rin handed me a blue electric guitar, already having plugged it into the amp. “You do play guitar, right?” Miku asked.
“Yeah.” I shot her a small grin. “How’d you know?”
“Lucky guess.” She grinned back. “Okay play whatever you want, I’ll follow your lead. Rin and Len,” she nodded her head to the pair on either side of them, “will do the same, they’re used to my improv so we should be fine.” Rin, having grabbed a bass as a replacement, gave me a thumbs up, and Len drummed a quick pattern in response.
My fingers hovered over the strings and I let out a slow controlled breath. I could do this. Focus on Miku, not the crowd in front of me. I tested a couple chords before settling on one I liked, and Miku picked up on it immediately.
“Found a torch in the sand and brushed away the sand, then took a deep breath. / Planted a nameless seed, took a watering can and filled it to the brim with hope.”
Oh, she was really gonna be on the nose about it, huh? A grin tugged on my lips. Whatever, her energy was infectious. I listened to Miku sing as Len joined in with the drums and Rin picked out a bass line. I waited for the right moment and joined in on the chorus, perfectly in sync with Miku.
“The resounding, “Oh yeah!” / the turning of this Blue Planet. / We’ve got to forge ahead, charge on, the sun goes up. / That’s right, up or down / either way, we’ll end up grinning from ear to ear!”
Artwork by Lys